Mom's Birthday

Today our shipment was delivered to Imagine in Ethiopia, so I guess today would be the official day waiting begins. Oops I was just so happy it arrived safely, I didn't think about the fact that it still had to get to the office! I will adjust my ticker :)
But what a special day for a milestone afterall. It's my mom's birthday!
Happy Birthday Mom!

...December 29, 2008 07:42 Addis Ababa - Ethiopia With delivery courier

December 29, 2008 10:01 Addis Ababa - Ethiopia Shipment delivered

Expecting from Ethiopia

Well, it finally happened...our Dossier arrived in Ethiopia today(much sooner than expected). We had hoped when we started this process on Aug.22nd that we would be officially waiting by the end of December but were told that goal was a bit too optimistic/unrealistic. But here we are, and I plan to hold onto my original goal of having our child home for next Christmas. Again, maybe a little too optimistic, but optimism is working for us so far.

We tracked our documents over this Christmas holiday, and it was more fun than tracking Santa. Below is the tracking record from the DHL website.

Air Waybill Number Origin Service Area Destination Service Area Status
Edmonton - Canada Addis Ababa - Ethiopia Arrived at DHL Facility as of: December 27, 2008 12:03


Detailed Report

Date Time Location Service Area Checkpoint Details
December 23, 2008 13:03 Edmonton - Canada Shipment picked up

December 23, 2008 17:45 Edmonton - Canada Departed from DHL facility in Edmonton - Canada

December 23, 2008 19:29 Calgary - Canada Departed from DHL facility in Calgary - Canada

December 24, 2008 02:37 DHL Wilmington Airpark, OH - USA Arrived at DHL facility in DHL Wilmington Airpark - USA

December 24, 2008 03:01 DHL Wilmington Airpark, OH - USA Transferred through DHL Wilmington Airpark - USA

December 24, 2008 07:25 DHL Wilmington Airpark, OH - USA Departed from DHL facility in DHL Wilmington Airpark - USA

December 24, 2008 08:37 New York City Gateway, NY - USA Arrived at DHL facility in New York City Gateway - USA

December 24, 2008 09:36 New York City Gateway, NY - USA Departed from DHL facility in New York City Gateway - USA

December 24, 2008 23:41 Leipzig - Germany Arrived at DHL facility in Leipzig - Germany

December 25, 2008 02:38 Leipzig - Germany Departed from DHL facility in Leipzig - Germany

December 26, 2008 02:02 Brussels - Belgium Departed from DHL facility in Brussels - Belgium

December 26, 2008 06:09 Frankfurt - Germany Arrived at DHL facility in Frankfurt - Germany

December 26, 2008 23:31 Frankfurt - Germany Departed from DHL facility in Frankfurt - Germany

December 27, 2008 11:59 Addis Ababa - Ethiopia Arrived at DHL facility in Addis Ababa - Ethiopia

December 27, 2008 12:03 Addis Ababa - Ethiopia Arrived at DHL Facility

There it is! I printed it for the baby book. Or rather, baby box. I keep all things for my kids that should go in a baby book in a baby box for when I get the time to sit down and actually create their albums. (I've actually started one of them...)

I hope this season had a great memory for you as well. Now we are looking forward to the time when we will have three excited, over-sugared, laughing, little people running around looking for cookie crumbs and signs of reindeer, in wonder at the magic that happened while they were sleeping.

Approved!

We received Government approval today! It is official, our Dossier is now final and on its way for translation and notarization, and then off to Ethiopia. So the end of this stage marks the beginning of another long journey of waiting. They are saying now the wait for a referral could be approximately 8 months, but it will be worth it. I can't wait to look back at all these important dates as I wonder where is my baby right now?
Are you born yet?
Are you with your first mother?
Or is she pregnant with you?
What were you doing today?
What will your Christmas be like this year?
So many questions and I may never know the answers. But I will keep anticipating your arrival and daydreaming about who you are. We are officially one step closer today on this journey to you.
See? We are creating milestones already, even though we are apart.

Xmas Picture

Here are the girls with Santa this year!

Merry Christmas from Alberta! (yee haw)

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

All I want for Christmas

We are still waiting to be "officially" waiting, but at least we're making progress. Scott and I received our final copy of our Home Assessment Report yesterday and that means that it is physically at the Government office that handles and approves international adoption. We are looking at about a 6-8 week wait in Alberta for official approval. Hopefully we will be hearing something before Christmas, that would be a nice present!

Got the lights up yesterday too, started some minor decorating inside the house, and got out the Christmas movies for the girls. I love Christmas!! Okay, so maybe it's a bit early for decorating, music etc., but I don't care, it's fun - my favourite time of year.

Maybe by next Christmas we will have another pair of little feet running around...

happy birthday to you...

We had a great birthday celebration yesterday for D's 2nd Birthday and my nephew's 6th Birthday. Good company, good fun and good cake.

Happy 2nd Birthday!

Look at the "Bubby" cake


she cuddled it and was sad for
"Bubby" (the cake)
when we cut it




Ethan turned 6!
He got an Indiana Jones cake!


peekaboo


Present time




A Star Wars laptop with
a lightsaber mouse


Her own guitar

Boo!

Happy Halloween! We had a successful day from music class to pre-school to pumpkin carving to trick or treating. There was only one minor glitch at the over decorated neighbour dressed as an alien playing scary music with fog and moving props house. As (Ariel) promptly ran away from the house, he came out after her to the end of the driveway to give her candy. When he realized her terror as she screamed and hid behind our neighbour (you see her little spiderman and fireman below) who we were trick or treating with, he took off his mask and tried to calm her fear. Despite that, we dodged any nightmares. Here's a photo summary. xo

Pumpkin carving time...

Success - thanks for the kit Nana and Grandad!

Let's go get some candy!

To auntie C and uncle J's house
(The girls excitedly asked me "I wonder what uncle Jereme will be dressed up as??)

Our friends from the Cul de Sac.


Sorting candy (mom gets the peanut butter cups!)


Good treats!


Worn out...


Our big girl manned the door the rest of the night and did a great job!

The Starfish Story

I was recently reminded of this parable.

Just want to share it.

adapted from The Star Thrower
by Loren Eiseley (1907 - 1977)

Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.

One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked faster to catch up.

As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean.

He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?"

The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."

"I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked the somewhat startled wise man.

To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them in, they'll die."

Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"

At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, "It made a difference for that one."

Whew, what a day yesterday. My hubby got home late from work and gave me the rundown. I guess he will be working overtime for awhile until things get back to normal. It is unbelievably fortunate how this all turned out. All 9 people who were sent to hospital are home safe now. Considering how close to the blast they were it is amazing they were not seriously injured. I just hope now the recovery and clean up is quick, safe and efficient.

On a lighter note, I had a wonderful day in another aspect yesterday with my 2 neices. It was lovely to have them over to play with the girls, and bake cupcakes and catch up with me! I am lucky to have such great neices and nephews, and I really enjoyed spending time with them.

Ok, changing the subject again, Dee is sitting over there on the couch trying for the millionth time to tell me her one and only knock knock joke. It goes like this: Dee: "Knock knock" Me: "Who's there?" Dee: "Bare bum". That's it. It is supposed to go "Who's there?" "bare" bare who" "bare bum", but she has shortened it and thinks she is so smart to tell you a joke. We have tried correcting her, but to no avail. It is so funny.

There was an explosion at my husband's plant today. It makes you realize how fragile life is. How instantly life can permanently change. Thank God I knew he was only on his way to work when it happened and that I knew where he was. And also that there are no fatalities.

Remember that proverb about the overflowing heart?

So now that I have this blog, the challenge will be to keep writing! I am glad to have a platform that allows me to share my life with people I care about.

So share I will...

I started this blog with the intent to write about our adoption travels, but I guess I really should have done this back in August, or even last January when the decision was forming permanently in our minds. It has been a wonderful and complicated decision, and I didn't quite expect the rollercoaster of emotion and explanation that would attach itself to this personal choice. The world of international adoption is unique and frightening.

The decision to adopt has been a wonderful and complicated decision. But I wasn’t prepared for the rollercoaster of emotion and explanation that would attach itself to this personal choice. The world of international adoption is both unique and frightening.

My husband and I have had countless conversations in our history together about adopting “one day”. The primary reason always boiling down to "there are children already out there who need a family, and we are a family who needs a child". It was simple. Really. Except that sometimes it isn't. Whatever it is, “one day” is now.

We chose international adoption over domestic instinctively, though not without consideration and research. The logic being that though there are children who need families in Canada, these children have their most basic needs met already and some semblance of a family, even though their circumstances are usually not ideal. Often internationally this is not the case. So, I have been asked if we are doing this for humanitarian reasons. And the answer is no. And yes.

Each time it starts getting complicated; I repeat our elegantly simple mantra. "There are children who need a family, and we are a family who needs a child." Some children need a family more desperately. Some mothers need a family to want their child more desperately. Well and truly, sometimes it is a matter of survival. Sometimes it is all is just so desperate that it breaks my heart in half.

I don't know why I often feel the need to let others in on our motivation. Maybe I want them to see our world through our eyes. Maybe I want them to see that is not an unwise move. Or that this should be so accepted and ordinary no one bats an eye about it. It should be a matter of fact that we do things for each other in this world. Adoption should not be something extraordinary. People shouldn’t say “Good for you”. That's the world I dream of, the one I want them to know; the one where people don't starve or die of AIDS; where kids who already exist don't need families that didn't bear them. This is not a humanitarian effort, though I can feel my heart growing around the world the more I learn. My compassion for it is creating something big and powerful within me. I want to do more. I wish I could do more. This is not a humanitarian effort. That is not what this is about. We are a family who needs a child, and there is a child out there who needs a family.

Yet, the further in we dip our feet, the more complex it becomes. We chose Ethiopia because it has a wonderfully functioning adoption program. It appears to be an ethical, safe, reliable, and there is a need for adoptive families. It appears the Ethiopian government genuinely cares for their children and the adoption program is structured accordingly, with the well being of the children at the front of their minds. It is easy to get in when the water is warm. But then realization washes over me like a river. We are taking these children out of their country. Another chapter in this saga; my head was dizzy with concern. Will my baby grow up and wish they still belonged to their country of birth? Will they resent me for uprooting them and displacing them into our white culture? Will they feel alone in their own family? Am I actually doing them disservice? We chose international adoption for all the right reasons. Will it turn out to be wrong?

In my heart of hearts I don't think so. But my discovery of anti-adoption advocates and grown up international adoptees, lovingly embraced into families, who now feel betrayed and alone, a stranger in their own home, shook my world seriously, and we had to do a lot of thinking. Scott and I resolved that there will always be issues between a parent and child and that no matter what issues may or may not arise in our family, we will equip ourselves as best we can, buck up and deal with it. We will not be able to predict what fate has in store for us, only be prepared. We will learn from the mistakes and successes of others. I realize how my role of mother is going to change in a big way. I will expand my horizons and learn about raising a healthy adoptive child. A child who will not look like us, therefore the fact that he/she has been adopted will have to be worn like a badge on our family. So we will wear the badge; a badge of honour. And it will be okay. Deep in the dark red middle of those heavy beats, I know that it will all be okay. These big question marks cannot be answered, only heeded. Really, I think it boils down to the same concerns about having another child, on a different platform. When I was pregnant I had all kinds of fears that I also had no control over. We went with our heart then too. We will be prepared. We will be a strong, proud, multicultural, Canadian family.

And then there is the great big price tag factor; the balking at the cost. What for? Why is it so expensive? There must be a better way? But in our world, that is the only way. People don't work for free. The costs are legitimate. I can sum it all up in a simple comparison. My sister, who I love dearly, had IVF in order to conceive her two beautiful little girls. Each time, the cost was just as significant as international adoption. In her case she paid for the services of doctors and nurses to have her child. We are paying for lawyers and judges. The only difference is that we have a choice to grow our family biologically on our own, she did not.

And another thing about the cost; I know that whenever I have bought a vehicle, took a vacation, or spent a large sum of money on other very different aspects within my life, I have never noticed so much as a raised eyebrow. It seems our culture breeds a society of people who instinctively put more emphasis on possessions than people. The same people who recoil don't even realize the duplicity of their reaction.

I say this also hating the fact that there is a price tag, so to speak, on receiving our third child. Not because of the money, but because there is a child involved. I hate the uncomfortable, sticky feeling that I can't seem to peel away from a monetary transaction that culminates with the reception of a child that I didn't bear. Which is why I have been doing my due diligence trying to pin down how much goes where and what happens when.., how are the children surrendered.., but what if there is family.., what is a kebele, how much for court costs, etc. etc.?????

What it boils down to it there are few things that I know in life for certain. And the following are some of those things. I know our decision to have another child is for the right reasons. I know that we have looked internationally for the right reasons. I needed to ensure that the children are being surrendered for the right reasons. And in Ethiopia they are. Mostly for the same gut-wrenching, tear your heart out, despairingly difficult, poverty induced, hard to ever imagine reasons; reasons that are hard to call ‘right’. These are their babies, and for many, this is a forced decision of circumstance that has life or death repercussions.
As for the ones without mothers, well, that is another situation fraught with a terrible amount of pain, disease and debate. 75% of children born to an HIV positive parent will be born HIV negative. This statistic will leave millions of healthy children parentless every year because a staggering number of people cannot afford the medication that it takes to simply stay alive and raise their families. Nations of child-headed households are battling to survive. Obviously adoption is not a solution to the problem. And yet we find ourselves here in this grey and muddy meantime.

We are trying hard to sift through life's choices making good decisions. Going with our heart has had a history of working to our advantage. We gravitated to adoption intuitively. Like someone was calling. We heard a knock. Now we are opening the door.

pee in the potty!

Yesterday Dee went pee in the potty! Hooray! Apparently candy is a huge motivator for her (go figure). So here we go on the potty training roller coaster. I wasn't sure I was ready to start and was planning on waiting until the spring, but I guess we are off and running, er, peeing now so...

I did it! yahoo

Well, I think I am getting the hang of this website. It was surprisingly easy to create. I have been meaning to do it for awhile now. Kind of a public journal, which is weird, but it seems like such a great way to keep family and friends informed on the process, as well as our day to day happenings, especially since so many loved ones are very far away...!
Now back to it...I've seen some blogs out there with music, so I've gotta figure out how to add that feature.
xo

signed off

This Thanksgiving we have a lot to be thankful for. On this beautiful, sunny fall day, with tummies full of leftover Turkey from our family celebration the night before, and hanging out in our cozies with the girls watching Disney movies, we unexpectedly got to sign off on our final homestudy report.

Now that we have done all of the paperwork the real waiting begins. We still have to wait a few weeks for Alberta's final stamp of approval, and then our 'report card' will be sent off to Imagine adoption to join the rest of our Dossier package for Ethiopia.

I am surprised at how easily this process has begun. I hope that is a sign of smooth roads ahead , and sense that it is a good omen.

Away we go!

just the beginning...

When the heart overflows, it comes out through the mouth.
~Ethiopian Proverb~